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Title: Alibis

Author: dixgrl78

Characters: Laura/Lee

Rating: M

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don’t own the characters, however, they do love it when I let them play – so if you ask them, they’ll claim me.

Spoilers: Set after Lay Down Your Burdens, Pt. 2 and AU from there.

A/N: Title from Tracy Lawrence song Alibis. Selenay_x provided the beta, but all errors are mine.



Alibis


She knows every move that a man can make

She knows every trick in the book

She knows how to give, she knows how to take

Cause so many times she’s been taken the fool

And boy you can bet if a move can be made

She knows how to make one on you…


Laura Roslin stares out the portal of her new quarters. Out beyond the floating wreckage of the ships, only small shards really, which previously housed over ten-thousand souls, Laura can see the murky planet Baltar is determined to establish as New Caprica. She sighs, gathering her blue silk robe around her as she moves to her bed. It’s not her problem anymore she tries to tell herself, not her problem. Laura decides not all moves can be good ones, not all moves can be right. If this is what the people want, then let the people experience the fate they chose. Ten-thousand souls gone and Laura knows it’s only the beginning. But it’s not her problem.

Her life is repeating itself, first with Adar, then Adama, and eventually she’ll have to deal with Baltar and Zarek. Laura continually has to dance at a ball she doesn’t want to attend. At least this time she will be the one to decide when to fill her dance card and the names to put in it. For the moment though, she’s content to leave it blank. She’s tired of analyzing and placating and maneuvering around the men in her life. So tired of using her charm, her wit, her body, her power to make them do what they know needs to be done.

For the time being, Laura wants to return to her life before all of them. She wants to remember what it was like to be naïve and foolish enough to believe in the goodness of humanity, to believe again that happiness exists, and that love can be given without strings attached. Laura laughs to herself as she reaches over to turn off the night-light. Sure, all of that is true, she mutters, and I’ll get right on convincing myself of that.

The knock on her door is so light and Laura nearly lets her head hit the pillow, almost allowing the sound to be lost to the endless night. But somehow Laura hears it and sits up in bed. Gathering her robe around her, she pads across the room, wondering who could be at her door at such an hour, all the while hoping it isn’t her prime suspect. She really doesn’t want to see him now, not because she’s still irritated by what he said, but because she just doesn’t wish to put on a face for him anymore.

Laura opens the door and takes a step back in surprise. She thought it might be an Adama, but she didn’t count on the man at her door being this one. “Commander,” she says, her voice a bit higher than normal as she absently finger combs her hair and stands in the doorway like a schoolgirl trying to impress a boy. Lee gives her a small smile, his appearance startling only because he’s wearing civilian clothes. He looks good in his faded jeans and baby blue shirt, relaxed even. Laura stares into his brilliant blue eyes for a moment too long, but she can’t help but stare. His eyes have always captivated her, always made her want to know what he was thinking of her.

“Hello, Laura.” His smooth timbre falls between the silence and makes Laura blink. He said her name so easily, as if he’s never called her anything but Laura in the entire time they’ve known each other. It’s a bit disconcerting and she blushes, instinctively stepping aside to let him in the room only out of patterned behavior and not rational thought. It takes a moment for her mind to catch up with her body, but she does find her voice eventually.

“Oh, sorry, come in.” She waits by the door, closing it behind him as Lee steps into the room and begins to look around. There isn’t much to see, but there’s never been much to see in her domains. Laura finds herself perplexed and just a tad bit nervous. Of all the men in her life, Lee Adama is the one she’s always had trouble reading. Every time she thought she pegged him, he shifted on her, did something to make her rethink her assessment. Now she’s just trying to comprehend why he is here. What could he possibly have to say to her after all this time?

Lee glances around the small room, noticing Laura’s silver suitcase in the corner, a small stack of books she’d no doubt suckered out of his father, and a couple of lamps from her room on Colonial One. He can’t help but smile when he sees an actual bed taking up most of the space.

“Bout time you had one of those,” he says, gesturing towards it.

“Yeah,” Laura replies, “can’t sleep on it though, too used to the broke in chaise.”

“Now that’s something,” Apollo smirks as he takes a seat on the mattress.


“I’m sorry I should have offered you a chair,” Laura says, shaking her head disapprovingly. “I didn’t realize I was so out of the habit of being a host.”

“It’s okay,” he shrugs, “I’m sorry I came by so late.”

“Nothing for me to do but toss and turn,” she returns, folding one leg under the other as she settles near her pillow on the bed, watching Lee watching her.


Lee was breathing normally again until she sat beside him on the bed. He shifts, mimicking her pose, liking the view of her straight on much better than having to crane his neck around to see her. He should have known she’d be in her robe. He did know she’d be in her robe. The sly thought makes him duck his head to hide his grin. Lee is here for a specific reason, a reason that has very much to do with that blue robe and the memories of the first time he saw her in it, memories he can’t get out of his head.

Laura’s eyes roam over Apollo, studying him as he shifts to look at her, as he gives her a quirky little smile seconds before he ducks his head and rubs at his mouth with his hand. She tilts her head and narrows her eyes. He can’t be here for that. Not now, not after all they’ve been through, after all the disagreements between them. But here he is radiating a subtle want. What’s his motive, what is he hoping to gain?

“So what can I do for you?” she asks, her voice a little shaky as she lets her confusion slip, hoping he will take the cue to clarify his reasons for making a social call at such a late hour. As Lee composes himself enough to return his eyes to her, Laura inhales, smelling only his pleasing cologne and not a hint of rock-gut like she half expected. A completely sober Apollo sitting coyly on her bed. She doesn’t know if she’s ready for this, if she will ever be ready for such a thing.

He can almost hear her thinking, echoing his own thoughts, as he sits and stretches out the moment, gathering his courage. She’s been on his mind for months now. Well, at least in the forefront. Laura Roslin’s been on his mind since the first day he stepped foot on the Colonial Heavy and watched her take charge. So amazing, such grace and beauty under such dire circumstances, but she only revealed her cracks to him. Why him? Lee’s been asking himself that question since that first day. He’s been trying to understand what exactly it is about Laura Roslin that continues to draw him in, make his blood boil, make his heart ache. It took him until two days ago to figure it out. He’s not always a fast learner, but Laura Roslin isn’t an easy study. She’s too complex, too good at being a chameleon.

“I wanted to talk to you,” he hesitantly begins.

“Okay, what about?” As Laura shifts her movements would seem graceful to anyone other than Lee. He sees how uncomfortable she is underneath that calm façade. He sees her pale green eyes straining, her mind working furiously to figure out his angle, to beat him to the punch, to take the next step in the dance before he begins it. And Lee just smiles.

Laura smirks at him, feeling her body tense as she fingers her robe. Lee Adama is in her room, sitting on her bed in civilian clothes and a smile on his handsome face. Why? Laura thinks back, remembering the last time she saw him, really talked with him. It was at Billy’s funeral. Dear sweet Billy. She’d heard Dee stayed by his side in sickbay and was thankful the girl managed enough grace to not hang on Lee at the funeral. Laura isn’t sure she could have handled that.

“Are you going to make me guess, Apollo?” she sighs, “Because I really am too tired to play games.”

“Are you, really?” he quietly asks, his blue eyes locking on to hers, his hand moving into the space between them.

“What?” Laura quirks an eyebrow and stares back at him.

“You’re very good at games, Laura. Games and dances, you know how to play, how to move. Did you dance with me?”

Laura feels the room grow hot or maybe it’s just her. Either way, she needs to move, needs to not see Lee’s hand mere inches from her knee, needs to be able to breathe. She stands and walks towards her small washroom, unfastening her robe tie as she goes, hoping to circulate some cooler air to her warm skin. Her back is to Lee; he won’t see her gown. It’s not like he hasn’t seen her vulnerable before anyway.

“Did you, Laura,” his voice is level, not holding any sign of condemnation, no sign of anger. If anything, Laura saw curiosity in his eyes when he first uttered his question to her. But now she can’t see his eyes as he looks at her back, her dark auburn hair fanning out as she runs her hands along her neck in a desperate attempt to cool off.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Apollo.” She avoids, he knew she would avoid. It’s what he would do.

“It’s a simple question, Laura,” he says, stressing her name, loving the feel of it on his lips, knowing she will catch the way he says it, how he floats from his mouth almost like a prayer. “When you and I were working together, did we dance?”

She turns to look at him, tears glistening in her eyes. Lee only notices the tears for a moment, his eyes drawn down her length, gazing at the visible amount of skin between her collarbone and her chest before his eyes see the blue silk of her gown, her fragile arms gathered over her breasts, her nearly flat stomach barely hidden by the pale fabric, her long legs, and he even stares at her feet, smiling at the sight of her polished red toe nails.

“Enjoying the view?” she quips, the red blush in her cheeks now from anger and not embarrassment.

“Very much, but you knew I would,” he replies, shifting again to rest his feet on the floor, aligning his body so that he is again facing her.

“Why are you here, Lee?” Laura asks, her polite demeanor changing as she begins to prepare herself for battle. She hoped he wasn’t here for a fight, but considering how his visit was a surprise, Laura isn’t sure what exactly she was hoping for. Yes, you do know, a small voice in the back of her conscious says. She frowns, trying to shake it away.

“You know,” Lee simply says.

He is so frakkin calm! It’s driving Laura insane. She stares at him, peering into his blue eyes, attempting to read his mind as she does every other man she knows. His father is so easy, Baltar, Zarek, Adar…all of them she knew enough about within a few days to see her through a lifetime of games and dances. They changed here and there, but so did she. She adjusted to their moves, realigned herself to their steps, not a hard feat to do. She slipped here and there, let her foolishness and her damn determination to believe goodness would prevail screw her over now and again, but overall she generally came away with what she wanted. Until Lee Adama.

“I do not…” she begins, but can’t make herself finish. Laura takes a breath, feeling her lungs expand as her body trembles and she fights to maintain control. She doesn’t want to break her stare with Lee but knows she may cry if she doesn’t. “It’s late,” she says instead.

“I don’t have anywhere else to be,” he counters, “And you are saving yourself from a restless sleep.”

“I don’t wish to play games with you, Lee. Whatever you came here for, just ask …”

“I have, Laura. I’m still waiting for a reply.”

“Did we dance?”

“Yes, did we? Was I just another game to you?”

He braces himself because he knows she is angry now, knows his question is out of the blue, knows she may lie to save face, to send him on his way. But Lee doubts she will tell him anything but the truth. She has every right to lie to him though, especially after the way he treated her when they returned from Kobol, the way he disappeared from her side, her steadfast Apollo all but abandoning her. But there was Kara and the way his father looked at Laura, the way Laura looked back with such hope in her eyes. Lee was jealous, as jealous as any child who has his favorite toy taken away from him can be jealous.

Laura closes her eyes, his question reverberating in her mind. Was I just another game to you? Did we dance? Just another game… She can see him standing before her all those months ago, his flight suit making him look strong and invincible as he nodded to Doral saying, ‘the lady’s in charge.’ She’d run to him after the shockwave with such a desperate need in her heart for him to be okay. She can still recall the exact lilt in her voice when she’d told him ‘Captain Apollo’ has such a nice ring to it. Can still remember the wave of pride and appreciation and near love, Gods help her, yes, love she’d felt for him when he stood beside her, his weapon trained on Tigh and the marines storming Colonial One.

How many nights had she spent near him, close enough to hear his steady breathing, to listen to his nightmares, to talk him through each one when he asked? When they were on the run and the iron bars no longer separated them, the ache to be near him only increased, made her short with her words, made her begin to distance herself from her trusted ally. Can he not understand that she had to do that, she had to put the space back between them to save him from her? Laura opens her eyes to see Apollo standing a few feet away from her. His posture is relaxed, his hands at his sides as he stands just watching her.

He isn’t talking and he won’t talk again until she does. Lee knows she needs to think, to remember, to rehash. He’s been doing all that also in the last couple of days since she lost the election and he found himself in the shower thinking of her as tears rolled down his cheeks. Dee found him there, banged on the door until he jerked back in to reality and heard her griping about him using all the water. When she saw his red eyes and depressed expression, she’d asked what was wrong. He couldn’t tell her, not then. He still hasn’t really told her the whole truth. She wouldn’t understand. She doesn’t know him, no one does. No one but Laura.

They made their mistakes with each other. He made her an ideal; she did the same to him. His fearless President, her heroic Captain Apollo. In their fantasy of happy-ever-after and goodness and light, it all made sense, but in the harsh, endless darkness of space and politics, there is no room for goodness and light and fantasy happy-ever-afters. At least that’s what he thought until he’d became so angry at her over Cain, until she’d reacted in such a harsh manner over his dealings with the black market. They did care about each other still, because in the mists of all his schooling on Cylons and humans, somewhere in learning all the hard lessons in life, Lee Adama remembered a valuable phrase – from such passion comes two emotions, love and hate.

He certainly doesn’t hate Laura Roslin. She certainly doesn’t hate him. That only leaves one emotion between them.

Lee continues to stare as Laura continues to breathe and think and try her best to get herself out of this situation. She could tell him to leave, but she doesn’t want him to leave. She could tell him a lie, but he’d see right through her lies. She could tell him the truth, but she doesn’t know if she can handle the truth, much less him handle it. But there he stands, her charming Apollo, with those blue eyes practically begging her to speak. It’s not like she hasn’t told him her secrets before about her cancer, about her fears. She’s always trusted Apollo with what she’s kept hidden from others. But this, can she admit this to him, truly admit it to herself?

“Were you just another game,” Laura says, her voice a whisper as her hands tremble beneath her crossed arms. She lets the sentence hang for a moment as she forces herself to say what she’s wanted to say to him for so long but never thought it her right to say. “No, Lee, I care about you too much to use you like that. You were never a game, we never danced.”

And still he stands there. At first, Laura isn’t sure if he heard her, isn’t sure if she should back away, begin a retreat before he starts a counterattack out of disbelief at her words.

But then Lee slowly nods his head and begins to flash that amazing smile of his.

“I knew you would say it if I stood here long enough and didn’t give you any other choice but to say it.”

“Say what?

“The truth. You can say it all, Laura. I won’t laugh at you,” Lee softly says, his tone cautious as if he is speaking to a frightened child.

“I don—“

“Say it, Laura. Say what you feel for me.”

“I care a great deal about you,” she stammers, hoping the firmness in her voice gives him the hint to not fish.

“I’m not fishing, I’m forcing, but that’s how it is with me and you. We have to be forced to admit our hidden truths,” Lee continues speaking in his melodic tone as he closes the distance between them. “Do you want me to say it first? I can, I’ve been saying it so many times to myself in the last two days. It’s coming easier now.”

Laura would back away if she could make herself move, but she doesn’t move because she isn’t convinced that if she did move she wouldn’t walk straight to Lee. Her heart is racing, each thud it makes falling in perfect rhythm to Lee’s sauntering stride as he moves in her direction. He wants her to admit the whole truth, does he? Can she admit that and what will happen if she does?

“Lee, I can’t –“

“You can, because I’m not like all those before me, Laura. I’m not Richard Adar, not my father, not any of those politicians or smooth-talkers out to use you and bed you and leave you out to dry when I am done with you. You know that, knew that from the moment we met. That’s why you let me walk away. But I’m not a child, Laura, and all the thoughts I’ve had about you are anything but motherly.”

She sees the desire in his eyes, the tautness in his muscles as he flexes his hands, letting them hover inches away from her covered skin. Laura again can’t breathe, again feels the room growing warm.

“Lee,” she sighs.

“I’ll say it and then you can say it. I don’t mind going first. It’s just like when I led the way off the Galactica, like how I cleared the ships for you until we reached Kobol. It’s just one more way for me to look after you, Laura, to protect you, to shelter you, care for you.”

Laura feels his breath on her skin as his lips hover near her ear, as his body presses into her personal space, so close but not touching her.

“I love you, Laura Roslin,” he whispers, his words the most seductive caress she’s ever felt. Laura stifles a sob and tries hard to deny what she just heard. At all times for her life to take another dramatic shift; she certainly is the Gods’ favorite fool.

“I won’t touch you, won’t kiss you, won’t hold you in my arms and make love to you until you admit it, too.” Lee’s voice floats to her, makes her moan as the images she’s suppressed for so long finally force their way to her conscious thoughts - his strong, tender hands traveling along her body, caressing her breasts, roaming over her thighs as he teases her with slow kisses before he melds his body to hers and comes inside of her. Laura whimpers, trying to bite back the words but losing her control, voices them in another strangled sob.

“I love you, Apollo.”


~*~


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